Sobanukirwa n’ibintu wakora ngo ugaragarize uwo mwashakanye ko umukunda by’ukuri (Igice cya 4)

Umukozi w’Imana, Rev./Ev. Eustache Nibintije, Umunyeshuri wa Patriots Bible University yo muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika abinyujije muri Minisiteri ye y’ivugabutumwa yise “Nibintije Evangelical Ministries” asigaye adufasha mu kugabura ijambo ry’Imana nkuko Imana yamuhaye uyu muhamagaro ikamwuzuza ubwenge bwo kugirango agirire abantu benshi umumaro mu gihe gisa niki. Uyu munsi yaduteguriye igice cya kane cy’inyigisho yatangiye yitwa “Ibintu wakora mu kugaragariza uwo mwashakanye ko umukunda nyabyo.

Muri ikigice cya 4 turakomeza tureba ibindi bintu nabwo bituma abashakanye banezezanya kugirango umubano wabo usagambe kandi urambe.

Ndi kwiga isomo rijyanye n’ imigenzo n’ imico, igice kimwe kiri muri iri somo ryitwa Anthropology. Kivuga ku imico y’ abantu yihariye, harimo umuco wo guhanahana impano (Gifts). Twizeko guhana impano bigira umumaro ukomeye kubijyanye n’urukndo rw’abashakanye.

Impano ni ikintu ushobora gufata mu ntoki zawe maze ukagishyikiriza mugenzi wawe maze bikamutera kuvuga ati ” Oh.. burya antekerezaho, Aranyibuka bivuzeko ushobora kwibuka umuntu mu kumuha impano.

Impano ni ikimenyetso cy’ urukundo ukunda umuntu, akaba ari ikimenyesho cy’ urukundo gifite imbaraga nyinshi. Impano ntabwo ireba agaciro k’ amafaranga iguze, icy’ingenzi ni ukwerekana ko umuntu agutekerezaho.

Ntabwo ari ukumutekerezaho bisanzwe ahubwo ni ukumutekererezaho bivuye k’ umutima w’ urukundo umufitiye maze ugahita ufata umwanzuro wo kubimwereka ukoresheje inzira yo kumuha impano kuko impano isobanura ko umukunda bivuye ku mutima, mu bitekerezo ndetse no mu bwenge bwawe maze ukabigaragaza inyuma ushyikiriza impano mugenzi wawe.

Iyo witegereje ku munsi mukuru wo gushyigirwa (Weddings) uba urimo gutanga no kwakira impeta ( rings). Abo baba bari kwambikana impeta baba bari guhamya urukundo bakundana batavuze kuko izi mpeta zigaragarira abantu bose bikaba ari ikimenyesho kigaragaza ubumwe(unity) bwabo bwo mu mutima.

Impeta ni ikimenyetso kigaragaza ukuri kandi kikerekana amarangamutima agiye atandukanye. Niyo mpamvu ugomba kumenya niba uwo mwashakanye aha agaciro iyo mpano y’ impeta kuko bishobora guteza ibibazo mu muryango wanyu mu gihe nk’umugore cyangwa umugabo akunda kugenda asize impeta atayambaye. Aha ndagira inama umuntu wese wubatse urugo ko akwiriye kujya aha agaciro impeta yo gushyingirwa kuko mu gihe mugenzi wawe akubona kenshi wirengagiza kuyambara bishobora gutuma atekereza ibindi byinshi bitari byiza.

Kenshi mu gihe umugabo cyangwa umugore umwe ahagaritse kwambara iyo mpeta ababibonye bashobora kubifata nk’ikimenyetso cy’ uko umubano wanyu udahagaze neza, ukaba wajemo agatotsi ( in serous trouble).

Ubusanzwe Impano (Gift) zigira ingano(Size) n’amabara bitandukanye, zimwe ziba zihenze cyane izindi zikaba zidahenze. K’ umuntu ukunda gushimishwa no guhabwa Impano, igiciro cy’ iyo mpano abenshi usanga ntacyo kibabwiye ahubwo ari ukumugaragariza ko amwibuka cyangwa umukunda.

Ariko nabwo ntabwo waba ufite za miliyoni na miliyoni maze wajya guha uwo mwashakanye impano ukamuzanira ifite agaciro ka $10 gusa, nawe urumva ko uwo mwashakanye azayibazaho byinshi cyane gusa aha sinshatse kuvuga ko ikiri imbere ari agiciro cy’impano umuntu yahaye mu genzi we bashakanye ahubwo ikibanziriza ikindi ni ukuzirikanana.

NIBA UGOMBA GUTANGA IMPANO NI NGOMBWA KWIGA KUREKURA IFARANGA.

Buri wese aba afite uko abona agaciro k’ amafaranga kandi akagira amarangamutima atandukanye ku bijyanye no gukoresha amafaranga. Bamwe bakunda kuyazigama (savings) kurusha abandi kandi bagakoresha ubwenge mu kuyakoresha. Niba uri umuntu ukunda kurekura ifaranga ntakibazo uzagira mu kugurira uwo mwashakanye Impano, niba uri wawundi uzigama bikabije bizakubera ikibazo, kuko utaba uri kugura ikintu cyawe ahubwo uzaba uri kugura ikintu cy’ uwo mwashakanye.

Kugirango bibashe kukorohera mu buryo bw’ amarangamutima nakugira inama yo kubikora nkaho uri kuzigama (saving) imigenderanire myiza n’ uwo mwashakanye, kugira ngo wuzuze uwo mwashakanye amarangamutima y’ urukundo kandi ayo marangamutima y’ urukundo niyuzura kuwo mwashakanye nawe azagarura ayo marangamutimana kuri wowe arushaho kukwereka imibanire myiza, kukubaha no kukwitaho.

Mu gihe mwese ayo marangamutima y’ urukundo yanyu ahuye gushyingiranwa kwanyu kuzagira agaciro mu buryo bwagutse. Ntugire ikibazo cyo kuzigama (saving) igihe cyose uzabaho amahoro kuko kubitsa mu rukundo rw’uwo mwashakanye ni ukuzigama bita” Kubitsa ku kintu gifite akamaro kurusha ibindi ( in blue-chip stocks).

Mu myaka yashize nigeze kwibeshya kuri uko kuzigama (saving) kubera umushinga nari mfite kandi uwo mushinga wari ujyanye n’ umurimo w’ Imana ariko aho byangeze ntabwo nzi uko nabikubwira. Ndakubwiye mu kuzigama kwawe ntukibagirwe no kuri iyo ngingo. Kuko bizahagarika ibibazo byinshi mu muryango wawe .

Amahoro atahe mu rugo. Kugira ngo ubisobanukirwe neza reka nifashishe ubuhamya bwa mwarimu wacu utwigisha ( Christian Counseling) yaduhaye nyuma ya Semina yigeze gukoresha y’ abashakanye. Umugore n’ umugabo bamusanze mu biro bye maze bagirana nawe ikiganiro .

Uyu mwarimu yadusangije ubu bunararibonye akoresheje uburyo bw’ibiganiro bagiranye n’uyu mugore n’umugabo.

Umugore: Umubano wacu wari warangiritse igihe kirekire ku buryo nifuje guta urugo maze ngatandukana n’ umugabo wanjye. Nagerageje kugisha inama kubo nita inshuti zanjye ndetse nabo nakwita abo mu muryango wanjye ba bugufi, hafi ya bose bambwira ko ibyo bintu ataribyo kwihanganirwa ko ibyaba byiza ari uko watandukana nawe kandi ko nta n’ikibazo nazagira kuko twari dufitanye n’ umugabo abana batari bake kandi ko Leta izabaha imfashanyo zishoboka zose.

Ati:” Pastor,Mwarimu namaze igihe kirekire ninginga umugabo wanjye mubwira ko nkeneye urukundo rwe( I need his love) ariko ntabwo nabashije kubona igisubizo.

Ariko kubera gukunda abana banjye kandi no kuba numvaga ko abana banjye bagomba gukura nanze ko bazahangayika babitewe no kutabana n’ ababyeyi babo bombi, yego bashoboraga kubona ibyo bakeneye ariko kubijyanye na Psychology nkumva ko ntababuza uburenganzira bwabo kuko ntaho naba ntandukanye n’ umugabo wanjye mu kutampa uburenganzira bwanjye bwo gukundwa nawe.

Kubera ibyo ndetse no kuva icyo gihe numvise nkomeza kwanga umugabo wanjye. Kuko ntakiza nabonye kiva k’ umugabo wanjye.

Ni umugabo ukora ibintu bye uko yabiteguye ( Is a methodical person) akora ibintu bye akurikije inzira yabyo uko yabiteguye ( by routine) nta muntu ushobora guhagarika inzira yashatse ko anyuzamo ibintu bye yateguye.

Nagerageje kuba umugore mwiza igihe kirekire nkora ibintu ibyo ari byo byose nkuko umugore mwiza akwiye kubikora. Natunganyije amabanga y’ abashakanye neza nkuko numva yaba abyifuza kandi akaba ari n’ ingenzi kuri we ndetse no kuri njye ariko ntacyo byatanze nakomeje kubura urukundo kuri we. Yewe habe no kunshimira kuri iyo mirimo yose.

Igihe cyinshi nagerageje kumubwira uko narimerewe ( my feeling) yaransetse cyane ambwira ko mu miryango yose tuzi nta mu ryango (no family) ifite icyerekezo cyiza kurusha iyacu akanyereka ibyo tumaze kugeraho ndetse n’ibyo tugiye kuzageraho bizatuma umuryango wacu ubaho nkaho yageze muri Paradizo. Ntabwo yigeze kunyumva ahubwo yateshaga agaciro ibyo ndi kumubwira. Ubwo aho uwo mugore atangira kugaragaza amarira mu maso.

Hashize akanya gato arakomeza ati” Mu kwezi kwashize twaje muri Semina yawe wakoresheje ariko nubwo twayijemo ntabwo numvaga ko hari ikintu cyashobora guhindura umugabo wanjye gusa naramwingize kuzaza muri ayo mahugurwa( Seminar), nabimumenyesheje mbere ho amezi 2 mbere ko iyo Semina iba kugira ngo atazambwira ko hari indi gahunda ( program) yapanze.

Kuko mu gihe abo nita inshuti zanjye ndetse n’ abo nakwita abo mu miryango yanjye yahafi bangiraga inama zo guta umugabo kandi ko ntacyo nzabura ko n’ umugabo bazajya bamuca amafaranga yo gufasha abana kandi ko nyuma y’ umwaka leta izajya impa amafaranga menshi y’ abana aturuka ku ( refund tax). Ubwo nabikojeje Ababyeyi banjye kandi mbereka ko nzanabafasha ariko bahise banyamaganira kure banyita ko naba mbaye umugore w’ injiji wisenyera ho urugo bitewe n’ akamanyu k’ umutsima.

Ahubwo bangiriye inama yo guhangana kandi ko “nta mvura idahita ko ahubwo nakomeza gusenga Imana”.

Ariko kubera izo nama ababyeyi bampaye byatumye ngira akanyabugabo ko kumwinginga tukaza muri iyo Seminar. Iyo Seminar twayijemo, turinda tuvamo nta kintu ahavugiye ariko uko namubonye nabonye asa nuwakunze amagambo yavugiwemo. Tugeze murugo nibwo yambwiye ijambo rimwe ko byari (funny). Kuko ntakintu narinteze kuri we nta rindi jambo namusubije naramwihoreye.

Ku umunsi ukurikiyeho avuye ku kazi ageze mu rugo ampa ururabo, ndamubaza nti:” Warukuye he? Ansubiza ko yaruguze k’ umuntu uzigurisha ku muhanda. Ntakindi nakoze nararwakiriye ubwo ntabwo nzi aho amarira yaturutse, narindi no kumubwira ko ari ibintu byiza akoze.

Ku munsi wa kabiri ( Tuesday) nagiye kumva telephone iri gusona, nyifashe nsanga niwe umpamagaye ambaza ku bijyanye no kugura Pizza azana mu rugo ku igaburo rya nimugoroba (Dinner). Namusubije ko icyo ari igitekerezo cyiza ( The idea is wonderful).

Ubwo yazanye iyo Pizza tugira ibihe byiza kuri uwo mugoroba hamwe n’ abana bacu dore ko banakundaga Pizza cyane. Barangije bashimiye Papa wabo nanjye ndamuhobera kandi mubwira uburyo yandyoheye.

Ku umunsi wa gatatu ( Wednesday)yazaniye buri mwana I box ya candy nanjye anzanira ikanzu (Dress) nziza. Ubwo natangiye gutekereza uburyo satani yari yarateye umuryango wacu, ntibagiwe uburyo nari ngiye kwisenyera bikazashyira mu bibazo abana bacu kuko numvaga ko umugabo wanjye adashobora guhinduka.

Ku munsi wa kane( Thursday) turangije igaburo rya ni mugoroba nagiye kubona mbona avanye carte Postal mu mufuko we w’ ikoti ( card postal) yanditseho ubutumwa bugira buti ” Igihe cyose numva ntashobora kugusobanurira uburyo ubu nsingaye ngukunda ariko ndizera ko iyi foto iri kuri iyi card ishobora kumfasha kugusobanurura uburyo nkwitayeho. Tugeze nabwo mu gitanda nabwo arambwira ati” ariko kuki tudashobora kujyana abana aho babadufasha maze muri iyi weekend tugasohokera ahantu hatuje tukaganira turi babiri

Ubwo twarabikoze tujyayo bukeye nabwo dusubirayo ndetse n’abana bose ariko muri iyo weekend yose nari ndi kwibaza ibintu byinshi kubyerekeye imbaraga z’ Imana ziri gukoresha umugabo wanjye n’ Inama Mama yangiriye. Byarandenze n’ amarira y ‘ amarangamutima y’ urukundo ndamwegera nshyira ukuboko kwanjye k’ urutugu rwe nda mubaza nti” Ushobora kumbwira uko byakugendekeye? Ntabwo ndi kubyumva.

Mwarimu: mwarimu yarebye uwo mugore maze araseka cyane.

Uwo Mugore: Pastor, mwarimu ntunseke, Nyumva. Uyu mugabo kuva twashyingiranwa nawe sinigeze mbona ururabo rwe, ntiyigeze ampa Card yerekana urukundo, ntiyigeze ansohokana mu myaka makumyabiri irenga yavugaga ko byaba ari ukwaya amafaranga, yewe n’ abana be ni uko. Ariko mu cyumweru kimwe nabonye ko Imana yahinduye imico ye ikanamwongerera urukundo ku muryango we.

Mwarimu: Yarahindukiye areba umugabo we maze aramubaza ati” Ni iki wamubwiye umunsi mwasohokanaga muri babiri gusa?

Umugabo : Namubwiye ko ndi mu mahugurwa (Semina) waduhaye nasobanukiwe ko amarangamutima y’ urukundo ye ashimisha umugore ari ukumuha impano, burya nahise niyemeza ko nzajya muzanira impano buri munsi kugira ngo mufashe kwikuramo stress yagize mu myaka ishize kandi narabigenzuye byagize icyo byangiza . Kandi namwijeje ko ngiye kumufasha mu bijyanye n’ amarangamutima y’ urukundo ajyanye no guhabwa Impano.

Umugore we: Ariko my love, ntabwo wagombye kujya umpa impano buri munsi ariko wabikora byibura nka rimwe mu cyumweru(week).

Pastor ubu sinamenya uko nabikubwira, ni ukuri yarahindutse yabaye Umugabo mushya ( a new man) ntushobora kumva ibyishimo n’ umunezero dufite mu rugo iwacu. Abana bacu ubu bari kuduhamagara ( lovebirds), ubu umutima wanjye wuzuye urukundo nashakaga kandi urwo rukundo ruri kugenda rusesekara hanze n’ abana bakarubona cyane.

Umugabo: Pastor Mwarimu, Nari naragabanukiwe mu gukunda (my sweetheart) ariko ubu ibyo akora byose mbona ari byiza cyane ku buryo iyo antekeye ibyo kurya ( food) bindyohera cyane nkumva ko ariwe muntu uzi guteka ku isi yose, ndi wonderful kuri buri kintu cyose kandi nzi yuko ankunda cyane.

Nshuti muvandimwe wakurikiye igice cya kane k’iyi nyigisho, ndumva narangiza nkugira inama zigera kuri 3:

1. Ujye ugerageza guha uwo mwashakanye impano byibura rimwe mu cyumweru

2. Mu gihe wumvise mugenzi wawe avuze ati: “Iki kintu ndagikunda, ujye ushaka aho ucyandika maze mukumuguririra impano( gift) abe ari cyo umugurira.

3.Ntugakore ikosa ryo kudaha uwo mwashakanye impano igihe cyose afite umunsi mukuru (birthday ) ndetse n’ abana banyu.

Ubu butumwa si umwihariko wa intyoza.com, ni inyigisho zikomoka mu ijambo ry’Imana utegurirwa kandi ukagezwaho na Rev./Ev. Eustache Nibintije, umunyeshuri wa Patriots Bible University yo muri Leta zunze ubumwe za America.

Tel/Whatsapp: +14128718098

Email: eustachenib@yahoo.com

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