Uburinganire bw’ibitsina byombi (Umugabo n’Umugore) ni ihame ryo guha abahungu n’abakobwa, abagore n’abagabo amahirwe angana yo gukoresha ubushobozi bwabo mu kubahiriza uburenganzira bwa muntu. Abagabo baza ku isonga mu basabwa kugira uruhare mu kurwanya ihohoterwa kuko n’imibare ibagaragaza nk’abaza imbere mukurikora.
Hirya no hino mu Rwanda mu mibanire y’abagabo n’abagore hagaragaramo ikinyuranyo kubijyanye n’uburenganzira bwabo, aho bigaragarira mu ihohoterwa rikorerwa mu ngo. Ntawakirengagiza ko abagabo n’abagore bahohoterwa, ariko ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko abagore aribo bahohoterwa cyane mu muryango nyarwanda.
Mu bushakashatsi bwakozwe n’ikigo cy’igihugu cy’ibarurishamibare ku mibereho y’abaturage (DHS 2014-2015, P 257), kigaragaza ko abagore 40% bubatse ingo bakorerwa ihohoterwa ribabaza umubiri bikozwe n’abo bashakanye, 31% barikorerwa n’abo babana cyangwa bakundana,12 % bahohoterwa ku gitsina naho 37% bakorerwa ihohoterwa ribabaza umutima.
Ubu bushakashatsi bugaragaza kandi ubusumbane hagati y’abagore n’abagabo mu ifatwa ry’ibyemezo mu rugo, aho 83% by’abagore bafatanya n’abagabo babo mu ifatwa ry’byemezo, mu gihe abagabo 93% bashobora gufata icyemezo ku buzima bwabo batagishije inama abagore bashakanye.
Iyi mibare igaragaza ko hakiri intambwe yo gutera kugira ngo umugabo n’umugore babashe kurushaho kubana neza no gufatwa kimwe mu muryango. Haracyari kandi ikibazo cy’imyumvire n’imitekereze ishingiye ku migani ya Kinyarwanda ipfobya abagore ikanaha icyuho abagabo cyo kubahohotera.
Urugero: Umugabo ahindukira mu buriri ariko ntahindukira ku ijambo, Iyo amazi abaye make aharirwa imfizi, Uruvuze umugore ruvuga umuhoro, Ingabo y’umugore iragushora ntigukura, Nta nkokokazi ibika isake ihari, n’iyindi.
Nyuma y’amateka u Rwanda rwanyuzemo ya Jenoside yakorewe batutsi mu 1994, abagabo n’abagore bashishikarizwa gufashanya muri byose nk’uburyo bwo gutera imbere no kubana neza.
Mu biganiro bitangwa n’inzego zitandukanye zishinzwe kurengera iterambere ry’umuryango, abashakanye bahamagarirwa kubahiriza ihame ry’uburinganire n’ubwuzuzanye kuko aribyo bibafasha gutera imbere, kandi baca umugani ngo “abishyize hamwe nta kibananira”.
Bamwe mu baturage twaganiriye bavuga ko iyo umugabo n’umugore babanye neza, bagafashanya mu mirimo yose kandi bakungurana ibitekerezo kucyateza urugo rwabo imbere, babasha kugera kuri byinshi kandi mu gihe gito, gusa ngo hakaba hakiri imbogamizi ziterwa no kutumva kimwe ihame ry’uburinganire n’ubwuzuzanye hagati y’abashakanye akaba kandi ngo aribyo biteza amakimbirane avamo gusenya cyangwa se n’ubwicanyi.
Nyirahabimana w’imyaka 42 y’amavuko utuye mu karere ka Kicukiro. Yagize ati” Umugabo n’umugore iyo bashyize hamwe bubaka urugo rugakomera ndetse bakaba intangarugero. Gusa ikibazo gihari abagabo bamwe na bamwe muri kamere yabo basuzugura abagore kandi bakikunda. Iyo tubahaye ibitekerezo akenshi barabisuzugura bakumva ko ari ibya kigore bitakubaka, ugasanga nibo bifatira ibyemezo bonyine twe dusa n’abahejwe, ariko urugo rugizwe n’abantu babiri. Rero njye numva bose bagakwiye kugira uruhare mu iterambere ryarwo cyane ko hari n’abagore batabyihanganira bigateza amakimbirane ashobora kuvamo n’ubwicanyi ariho wumva ngo ibunaka umugabo yishe umugore cyangwa umugore yishe umugabo”.
Uwamahoro nawe avuga ko abahohoterwa cyane ari abagore nubwo hari n’abagabo bake bahura n’ihohoterwa, aho avuga ko hari abagabo batarahindura imyumvire ngo bubahirize ihame ry’uburinganire n’ubwuzuzanye ahubwo bakumva ko aribo batware kubera kwikunda bityo bagaheza inyuma abagore babo.
Yagize ati” Ihohoterwa rikorerwa mu ngo akenshi usanga abagore ari twe tubigenderamo kuko hakiri abagabo bakigendera ku myumvire ya kera bakumva ko umugore icyo amaze ari ugukora imirimo yo mu rugo no kubyara nta kindi ashoboye. Iyo rero ushatse umugabo ufite imyumvire nk’iyi ukagerageza ku musobanurira ko ihame ry’uburinganire ryaje mugomba gushyira hamwe mu kuzuzanya kugira ngo muteze imbere umuryango wanyu abyumva nabi akumva ko ushaka kumwambura inshingano bityo agatangira guhindura imyitwarire, akagutoteza cyangwa akaba yanagukubita kandi amakimbirane niyo ateza ibibazo byinshi”.
Nubwo bimeze bityo ariko, abagabo bafite uruhare runini mu kugaragariza bagenzi babo urugero rwiza mu kubaha abo bashakanye no guhamagarira bagenzi babo guhagarika imyitwarire mibi ihonyora uburenganzira bwabo.
Umuyobozi w’umuryango nyarwanda urwanya ihohoterwa rikorerwa mu ngo abagabo babigizemo uruhare ( RWAMREC), bwana Rutayisire Fidele avuga ko mu Rwanda uburinganire n’ubwuzuzanye bikomeje gutezwa imbere kandi bimaze gufata intera yishimiwe na benshi, nubwo hari aho usanga bamwe mu bagize umuryango batarabasha gusobanukirwa neza icyo uburinganire n’ubwuzuzanye bw’umugore n’umugabo bisobanuye.
Yagize ati” Mu rwego rwo gusangira imirimo n’inshingano mu Rwanda rwo hambere abagore bari bafite inshingano zabo bihariye n’abagabo bakagira izabo bihariye hashingiwe ku ngufu n’uburere bya buri wese. Gusa ibi ntibyatindwagaho kuko byafatwaga nk’uburyo nyabwo bw’imibanire y’abashakanye kuko byari bishingiye ku muco wariho icyo gihe. Ariko iyo usesenguye usanga iyo mirimo hari abo yahaga agaciro kurusha abandi, cyangwa ikavunisha bamwe”.
Yakomeje agira ati” By’umwihariko umugabo akwiye kwita kuwo bashakanye akamugaragariza urukundo (care) rutagamije kumwigarurira ngo amugire igikoresho nk’uko bikunze kugaragara ku bagabo bamwe na bamwe, ahubwo rugamije gushimangira agaciro afite. Akwiye kandi gufatanya n’umugore we inshingano zerekeranye n’uburere bw’abana babo ndetse n’iz’umuryango muri rusange, akanatega amatwi uwo bashakanye ndetse akimakaza umuco w’ibiganiro mu muryango basangira ibyishimo cyangwa ingorane, imigambi ndetse n’ibyemezo bya ngombwa”.
Yongeyeho ko ububasha umugabo akoresha ahohotera umugore ashobora kubukoresha amurinda ihohoterwa iryo ari ryo ryose, bikimakaza iterambere n’ubworoherane mu muryango.
Umugore akwiye gufatanya n’umugabo kwita ku rugo rwabo ngo rugwize umuco mwiza, ibirutunga no kurwubaka rugakomera nk’uko bigaragara mu ngingo ya 207 y’igitabo cy’amategeko agenga umuryango.
Icyo gitabo kandi giteganya ko umwe mu bashyingiranywe yiharira imirimo iyo undi adashobora kugaragaza igitekerezo cye kubera ko yarwaye, ko yazimiye, ko ari kure y’iwe cyangwa bitewe n’indi mpamvu. Gusa birasaba inzira ndende kuko ingo nyinshi zigifite amakimbirane aterwa n’ubusumbane hagati y’abashakanye ndetse abahohoterwa bagatinya kubigaragaza kugira ngo badasenya cyangwa batishyira ku karubanda. Nyamara, ibi biteza ingaruka mu bakomoka kuri bene iyo miryango aho usanga abana bataye amashuri kubera kutumvikana kw’ababyeyi babo ndetse hakabamo n’ubwicanyi n’ibindi bitagamije kubaka umuryango.
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NYIRANGABO Anathalie
